Summer 2003 Toolbox

The inheritor’s journey

Navigating the Dark Side of Wealth:
A Life Guide for Inheritors

By Thayer Cheatham Willis
New Concord Press, Portland, Ore., 2003
201 pp., $25

Reviewed by Dennis T. Jaffe

Thayer Willis is an heir to a lot of money, and she’s proud of it. But she didn’t come into her pride and self-esteem easily. In fact, inheriting wealth from her father’s successful family business, the paper giant Georgia-Pacific, made it difficult for her to feel good about herself, find loving relationships and discover what to do with her life. The lessons she learned in coming to terms with inherited wealth inspired her to train as a psychotherapist and counsel other heirs about problems related to wealth, relationships, work and personal development.

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Willis suggests that while those who aren’t heirs may see such wealth as a great benefit, inheritance isn’t a simple joy. Rather, it marks the beginning of a struggle to develop an identity, use one’s money responsibly, form important relationships and work for a greater good. “[I]f you have inherited substantial wealth,” she writes, “then you know that it is harder for you than for most people to achieve a sense of purpose and competence.”

This may not be on the short list of the world’s most pressing problems, but the potential human cost in wasted opportunity certainly justifies writing this book. The pain of some of the anonymous heirs whose stories are presented reminds us yet again that money doesn’t buy happiness.

This book is a guide to help heirs ensure that their wealth enriches their lives and isn’t lost to future generations. It shows how the inheritors of a family fortune can learn to become stewards and guardians of their wealth rather than mere consumers of it. While some relatives can go into the family’s business, most heirs will have to find their own way through life and work.

Willis begins this powerful, deeply felt book with her own experience and frequently shares bits of her own struggle. Her personal experience gives authority to her pronouncements and enables us to understand how she came to see the world as she does.

Each chapter is filled with stories from Willis’s own experience and her clinical practice, presented in poignant and riveting detail. Stories of heirs who squandered their wealth and entered destructive relationships dot the book. They are reported without judgment, and often without a clear resolution. In fact, it is sometimes frustrating not to have a clearer idea of how these people worked on their seemingly overwhelming issues.

The struggle to come to terms with wealth begins on the dark side. Inherited wealth comes with a sense of guilt for not having earned it, distrust that other people are after your money, a tendency to be exploited in relationships and difficulty in finding satisfaction or useful work.

Willis suggests that achieving faith and embracing a higher purpose are necessary to come to grips with wealth. While this book certainly fits on a Christian bookshelf, Willis takes pains to avoid offending non-Christian readers. (Her citing of Biblical sources struck me as no different from the use of Buddhist or Sufi stories to illustrate points.)

Willis’s major prescriptions are familiar: Be responsible in becoming aware of and using your wealth. Create relationships based on communication, love, trust, loyalty and compromise. Find a calling and purpose in life. Get an education. Develop your character by what you do and who you are, not through your money. The growth process, according to Willis, involves moving one’s money from the foreground to the background. Money doesn’t relieve people of the need to work; it makes the choice of career both broader and more difficult.

People who come from a family business must be ever mindful of what it means to grow up with wealth. This book is a useful guide to the various challenges they must overcome.

Dennis T. Jaffe, Ph.D., is a member of the Aspen Family Business Group and a professor of organizational inquiry at Saybrook Institute in San Francisco (djaffe@saybrook.edu).

How to spot leadership potential

Who in your company shows the most promise as a future leader? When you’re assessing leadership potential, make note of each candidate’s personal attributes, advises Robert W. Rogers, president of Development Dimensions International (DDI), a human resources consulting firm with offices in 26 countries. Rogers recommends assessing high-performers based on the following ten factors. These attributes, he notes, are fundamental components of a leader’s personality; you can’t easily train someone to acquire them.

Leadership promise

Motivation to lead: Displays upward ambition to influence others in the organization; pursues formal and informal leadership opportunities.

Bringing out the best in people: Cultivates and optimizes others’ talent and capability; inspires high performance and morale; believes in the strengths of others; unites others toward common goals.

Authenticity: Offers genuinely true opinions; acts with integrity; promotes trust among others; self-discloses when appropriate; displays confidence but not arrogance.

Personal development orientation

Receptivity to feedback: Seeks feedback and uses it; welcomes and accepts constructive criticism; displays humility; demonstrates high expectations for himself or herself.

Learning ability: Learns from experiences and mistakes; quickly assimilates new information; displays intellectual curiosity; possesses a range of interests.

Balance of values and results

Cultural fit: Behaves and makes decisions in a manner that is consistent with critical organizational vision and values; models organizational culture for others.

Passion for results: Gets things done; overcomes obstacles; strives for excellence; demonstrates perseverance and “iron will” in the face of challenges.

Mastery of complexity

Adaptability: Expresses “can do” attitude; embraces change; adjusts readily to new situations and people; balances multiple and competing demands.

Conceptual thinking: Thinks in broad or conceptual terms; sees issues from new perspectives; understands how varied components come together; demonstrates expansive thinking to resolve problems.

Ability to navigate ambiguity: Sees in “shades of gray”; simplifies the complex; responds effectively to unclear situations; maintains confidence despite ambiguity.

For more information, see DDI’s website, www.ddiworld.com.

Tips on perpetuating a business

Here are six suggestions for family business owners grappling with the challenge of growing and perpetuating their companies, offered by Benjamin J. (Patrick) Denihan Jr.

Denihan is executive director of his family’s hospitality company, the recently re-branded Affinia Hospitality in New York City (formerly Manhattan East Suite Hotels). This advice is adapted from Denihan’s article in the Winter 2003 issue of MWorld, a publication of the American Management Association.

1. Don’t just follow in the previous generation’s footsteps. Study their actions and results, and learn how to improve on their methods.

2. Don’t be afraid to seek the appropriate outside talent to complete your team. You may be placing your company in danger by struggling to keep responsibilities “in the family” when family members lack the necessary specific expertise.

3. Face sensitive issues among family members head-on. Brushing them under the carpet, as so many families do, only causes them to fester.

4. Consider working with an outside expert on family business planning. You’ll benefit from the presence of an experienced sounding board who knows how to foster communication.

5. Determine the requirements that family members must meet before they enter the business. Share these openly with your family members, so that they understand there’s no free pass for entry—they must possess the necessary qualifications, just as any other applicant would.

6. Don’t force family members to join the family business. Let them explore their own talents and make their own decisions. If they later choose to enter the business, the company will benefit from their outside perspective.

Tool kits for a people-friendly workplace

Do employees consider your company a great place to work? A series of step-by-step guides to enhancing your work environment are offered by Winning Workplaces, a non-profit organization that helps small and mid-size companies institute people-friendly programs and policies. The 46 kits are based on successful programs at other companies.

The tool kits are organized according to what Winning Workplaces defines as the “building blocks” of a people-friendly organization:

1. “Trust, respect and fairness” (tool kits are available on instituting an employee handbook, flexible and seasonal work schedules and a new employee orientation program).

2. “Open communications” (tool kits on setting up bulletin boards, a company intranet, a company magazine and internal newsletter, and employee meetings).

3. “Rewards and recognition” (tool kits on establishing basic benefits and offering extras such as safety and service awards and seasonal gifts).

4. “Teamwork and involvement” (tool kits on organizing company social events, establishing a matching gifts program, and setting up a recreation area).

5. “Work/life balance” (tool kits on establishing an adoption benefit and developing concierge, legal counseling and retirement planning services).

6. “Learning and development” (tool kits on instituting educational awards, employee job training, and wellness programs).

Winning Workplaces was founded by members of the Lehman family, one of three family branches that together owned Fel-Pro Inc., an auto parts manufacturer they sold to Federal-Mogul in 1998 (see FB, Winter 2000). Fel-Pro ranked fourth on Fortune’s 1998 list of the “100 Best Companies to Work for in America.” In addition to the tool kits, Winning Workplaces sells employee survey services and offers other free information through its website, www.winningworkplaces.org.

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